Kid-Hours

Admittedly, it's been a while since my last post.  We've been a bit busy... But it's a little more than just busyness.  You see, I have a special function in my brain.  I refer to it as Kid-Hours. It's something that I've recognized as I had more and more kids. 

I have been told that I must have tons of patience, having so many kids. Well, I suppose that might be true.  There are certainly a lot of demands with having 5 kids.  I hear "Mommy" about 3 times a minute - that can be trying at times. And yet my children still don't know what the real swear words are - I count that as a victory!  So yes, I have a huge tank of patience. 

But I have to. You see, this is where Kid-Hours comes into play. 

Kid-Hours is the product of number of hours spent multiplied by number of children time spent with.  (Kh= k x h)  Examples always help illustrate an equation...  Say you are babysitting 2 children for 3 hours.  Well, you will expend 6 Kid-Hours (2kids x 3hours = 6Kid-Hours).  If you are a stay-at-home mother of 3 and your husband is gone 10 hours (including drive time) for work, you expend 30Kid-Hours a day.  For me, my multiplier is just higher.  5 kids at 10 hours?  50 Kid-Hours.  I've gotten used to it (thank goodness, for my kids' sake!).  My meter just spins faster than most.  Generally it runs smoothly... or "smoothly" is probably more accurate... 

My brain allots patience like Consumers Energy monthly budget plan.  I wake up in the morning, and I have just enough to make it through the average Kid-Hour day.  This normally is fairly effective. Our house runs on a pretty tight schedule. 

On occasion I will get a call from Jerry that he will have to work late.  What happens in my brain is much like what happens when there isn't enough electricity to meet demands.  A brown-out.  Must... Conserve... Kid-Hours....  He might come home and ask silly questions like, "Are you aware that the kids are playing in the sandbox in their pajamas?" or "Did you know the kids have the hose in the garage?"  To which I unashamedly respond with a blank stare and a garbled, "huh?" 

This summer has been especially trying on my Kid-Hour meter.  I'm waiting for smoke to start pouring out of it and the springs to go flying.  Jerry has worked more Saturdays this summer than the past 4 years combined.  Unexpected spike in Kid-Hour usage.  He worked through July shutdown.  When almost everybody in the automotive world had a week off, he was doing 4am starts, working through the holiday, through weekends.... Kid-Hour OVERLOAD!!!! 

This past week was VBS at church.  I LOVE VBS!!!!  It's fun, and the kids have fun, and the songs are fun, and everything is so fun!  But by Friday at noon, I couldn't move.  So. Many.. Kids....  Couldn't. Move.    Brain.... tired!

Luckily this week is slightly less hectic.  I plan to pour some energy into re-filling the meter.  Writing a little.  Reading a little.  Planning ahead a little.  Locking myself in my bathroom and eating chocolate a little.  So hopefully by NEXT week, I can function and interact with society without looking like this:

"I'm sorry.  Your allotted Kid-Hours have expired. Shutting down."